A New Board & Care Resident – Is She Welcome or Not?

While I was away briefly getting our son settled at college, a new resident moved into the board & care facility my Mom lives in. “P” is a lovely woman and, from my interactions with her so far, seems to be high functioning in her mental and physical capacities. I think she will be a lovely addition to the “Happy House,” which is what I call my Mom’s board & care because all the residents are so sweet and pleasant to be around!

Welcome to your new home “P”!

The only problem is that she brought her cat, Sophie, to live there, too.

While I am not a cat owner, we do own a dog and I am truly an animal lover! However, I must admit I am not pleased about this turn of events in my Mom’s house.

Why Does The Cat Bother Me?

“P” will be keeping the cat and litter box in her private bedroom with the door closed, and will also be feeding Sophie. I understand the caregivers of the board & care will only be in charge of changing the litter box and rounding up the cat if she manages to sneak out of the bedroom into the rest of the house. I think the caregivers have enough to do caring for the residents and the household without putting more responsibility on their shoulders.

If the cat does “escape” from the bedroom and runs through the house, I am concerned that one of the other residents could trip over the cat, be startled by it and fall, or even get scratched by Sophie if the cat jumps up into their laps or beds. (Many seniors have extremely thin skin that can tear easily.)

I wonder if any of the residents or their visitors are allergic to cats? I hope the Administration checked on the residents’ possible cat allergies before allowing the cat to move in. I would be unhappy if Sophie’s presence stops other regular visitors from coming. For example, my son is highly allergic to cats, so when he comes home for holidays and vacations, it remains to be seen if he’ll be able to visit his grandmother without having an allergic reaction there. Based on past experience, it will depend on how much time the cat actually spends in other areas of the house. If cat hair and dander is spread throughout the house, my son will not be able to last more than a few minutes before having an allergic reaction to the cat.

Since my Mom moved into the board & care, I’ve been bringing our dog, Shyanne, to visit about once a week. All of the residents enjoy watching her antics as she roams about “investigating” the premises, looking for crumbs to eat off the kitchen floor, and playing with dog toys I bring along. I also give each resident one-on-one time with Shyanne in their laps to pet and cuddle with if they wish. Pet therapy is a wonderful thing for our Golden Oldies! I’m not sure I will be able to continue this activity now because I don’t know if Shyanne and Sophie will get along if they cross paths.

Why the Cat is Wonderful!

“P” told me she’s owned Sophie for 13 years, since she was a kitten. I would never force her to give up her dear pet whom she loves very much.

If Sophie does become a “member of the family” there, I’m sure the ladies will grow attached to her and enjoy her presence daily.

Some Questions I Need Answered

• Does the Admission Agreement have any statements about pets coming to live in the facility? What are the residents’ rights in this regard?

• Did the Board & Care Administration check with the current residents’ and/or their families about cat allergies? Maybe they did but because I was away they haven’t contacted me about it yet. I think this is a must-do before bringing a new pet into a facility!

• Whose rights come first in this situation? The new resident moving in with their pet, or the residents already living there?

My Action Steps

• I will be checking our Admission Agreement to see if there is a written policy regarding pets in the facility.

• If the Administration doesn’t contact me, I will call them to discuss the pet allergy issue and my other concerns about Sophie.

• I will ask some of the other residents’ families when they’re visiting how they feel about the new cat living there.

• I will ask the caregivers how the cat is adjusting to life in the house. Whether Sophie is staying in “P’s” room or coming out into the community areas and how often? I will ask them if they feel it is more work for them to care for the cat.

• Since I visit frequently, I will observe how much the cat stays in “P’s” bedroom, as well as how much time the caregivers spend on cat-related duties. I’m not there all of the time, but I do visit nearly every day and think I will be able to get a good idea of any major changes that may be occurring.

So, for the time being, I will do some further research and take a “wait and see” attitude before I roll out the welcome mat for Sophie the cat.

What would you do in this situation?

Is there anything else I can do?

Do you think I have a right to react this way or am I being unreasonable?

Let’s discuss . . .

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